The Cask Vs Keg debate has been rearing its ugly head every time beer bloggers and twitterers have nothing better to talk about. It’s about time we finally figured out which was best, and so, I have come up with a series of battles to determine the ultimate winner.
1. The Hill Race.
One keg and one cask are taken to the top of a hill and released. The winner is the one that reaches the bottom first.
2. Cask vs Keg Conkers.
Using cranes and rope or wire of an appropriate strength, cask and keg will battle it out in a giant version of conkers. The cranes will be controlled by a vocal spokesperson for each of the dispense methods, and the winner will be the person who manages to break their oppenents dispense vessel.
The use of vinegar (or gone off beer) as an aid will result in disqualification.
3. Cask vs Keg Benchpress (suggested by Nate of http://www.boozebeatsbites.com/)
“Can James Watt bench press more kegs than Colin Valentine can casks? No keykeg cheating, Watt. ”
Rules will be the same as in standard championship weightlifting, whatever they are.
4. Around the world race.
With the start overseen by the Queen, one keg and one cask will be set off on a voyage around the world. The first to fully work its way around the world will be declared the winner.
5. Cask Vs Keg Stare Out Competition
A pair of googly eyes is stuck onto a cask, and another pair onto a keg. The two are then placed and battle it out in a stare out competition. The loser is the first one to blink or look away.
The ultimate winner will be the one that wins the most of these five challenges.
Let the games commence!